I Know it Still Hurts

By: Marc McMahon

I would like to start off by saying if you are currently in recovery from an addiction that I think you are one bad ass S.O.B. Someone who is not only fighting the demon of their addictions but also the hell hound that guards the gate to the closet that holds the majority of a person self-worth, dignity, and respect. The one that says your not good enough, you’re never going to be good enough, and you are simply fooling yourself with all of this recovery bullshit. The one that suggests the world and all of those you hold dearest to your heart would be better off without you. At least this way you are not able to hurt them anymore with the F5 Super celled Tornado that oftentimes is called your life.

Recovery is no easy task so I applaud you for having the courage to do it. I have been at this recovery thing for some time now and I still struggle with my demons today. I came back from my relapse a couple of months ago and I am still struggling to keep my monster in his cage. I do for some time then he rears his ugly head again and I have to fight with him to get him back in his cage. It is like I am able to get him back in his box but I have yet been able to secure the final chain that wraps around it securing him tightly inside. But this to shall pass and I will ultimately win this battle that is for sure but for now, it is a battle and at times a struggle for me still.

man in white shirt using macbook pro

I say that because it is important to me that I remain as transparent as humanly possible and tell the truth even when I don’t want to. Even when it is embarrassing, humbling, and sometimes downright painful. So I do not give off the perception of being clean and sober when I am not. That is what this article is about really. It’s about letting you all know that although back online here in a somewhat regular fashion I am still struggling to stay clean. So that others who are struggling like me can reach out to me and say hello I am struggling too and I was wondering if we can struggle together.

The answer to that question and one of the reasons why I started this blog is YES, we can struggle together. Pick each other up when we have fallen down, dry each other’s tears, and simply know that there is someone just a few keyboard taps away that knows what we are going through and truly cares for our well being and how things turn out for us. Recovery is definitely a “We” thing and without each other, we would be easy pickings for the demon of addiction to grab, gut, and slaughter much like the holiday Lamb the family has been fattening all year to eat.

So let’s stand strong together with all lengths of sobriety and beat this thing united in a kickass clean and sober army that crushes this disease every chance it gets. Never forgetting that “Alone we don’t stand a chance, but together, we can change the world.” Stay blessed you all.

About The Author: Marc is a 50-year-old Author, Speaker, and Soldier in a war to loosen the grasp that Substance Abuse has on our society. He is a Father, Son, and friend to all those seeking refuge from this incorrigible disease. Marc resides in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where he enjoys, writing, hiking, and kicking the disease of addiction in the teeth, every chance he gets. As Marc always likes to say, “be blessed, my friends!”






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