*Recovery Unsensored is honored to share with you Guest Author #3 Katie J Moric and her recovery insight from 20+ years of recovery, it’s fabulous!
BY: Katie J. Moric
Yeah you, and quite possibly a hypocrite. I can honestly say I have not abused drugs or alcohol since December 18, 1989, but that doesn’t make me any less of an addict than you. If you do not want to read one addicts honest opinion of America’s drug crisis, then scroll on by or turn the page. Will you acknowledge the crisis and be part of the solution?
Drug and alcohol addicts are shamelessly judged by society. Let’s think about this in a new light. You don’t see workaholics jailed for spending too much time laboring on projects. Do you see many obese people living on the street? A housewife with closets filled with clothes and shoes is not shunned from social events. No matter who you are, you are addicted to something. Absolutely no human on earth is perfect, if you’re offended by that, too bad, it’s the truth.
Let’s look at some examples of things killing your self-control. Have you ever gone to check an e-mail account and found yourself on Facebook half-an-hour later, not even concerned with why you were checking your e-mail? What about, reaching for a candy-bar at your desk only to realize you have already finished it? Guess what, you just lost control.
Addictions trick you and hours of research has gone into getting you addicted. Advertisers, politicians and teachers have all been guilty of playing on people’s emotions to entice action. I hope that you can realize your addiction(s) and identify with the sense of lost control. Your addiction may very well be accepted by society and not causing outwardly visible pain, trust me, that pain is still lurking.
We long to be loved and accepted. The paradox of comparison leads to friendship and understanding or judgment and self-righteousness. Can we look at each person that is different from us and see the greatness of their being? Imagine having a conversation with the Pope, a drug addict and a child. Close your eyes and envision sitting directly across from each of them and looking in to their eyes.
Say sincerely to each of them, ‘You are loved.’ Challenge yourself to believe this statement with all your heart and mind. It’s okay to stop and try it, go ahead. You can change out the people as you see fit to break down whatever barriers you may have in your heart: racism, chauvinism, greed, lust, pride etc. It may take a long time before you believe it if you imagine someone who has wronged you. Now to live it out is a whole other story.
The comparison paradox can lead to many unhealthy relationships. The drug addict is going to hang out with the other drug addict. The alcoholic is going to spend much of their time with other alcoholics. If you are addicted to shopping, chances are you have shopping friends.
If you are a workaholic you probably know every other person that is in your building after regular hours. Yes, we all know that birds of a feather flock together. You are meant to do life with others. If your desire is to change your behavior, you have to change your environment and companionship.
During the struggle of drug and alcohol addiction it is very easy to feel like no one cares. Yes, there is a time and a place for solitude and silence but in general we need other people. Believe it or not, you are not alone. There is someone who has gone through similar circumstances and that person is willing and able to help.
If you don’t locate a community that is in your reach, you may need to form one, which could be challenging but not impossible. I’m talking about face to face contact. Yes, real human interaction with conversation, emotions and everything that goes along with it.
If you’re a drug or alcohol addict, I hope you found this article truthful and useful. If you are someone trying to help an addict, I hope you have realized that we are all broken in some form or another. If you are desperate and alone, I hope that you realize there is help. Some of the most encouraging words ever spoken to me along my journey are: “I believe in you.”, “You are loved”, “I’m not judging you”, “You are strong.” “I see your pain” “Believe”.
Will you put some of these phrases in your back pocket, so to speak, and pull them out when you come across a situation that finds you speechless? I encourage you all to live like you are loved and give away that love to others in need.