BY: Marc McMahon

So I'm sitting at my desk in my living room tonight listening to music and drinking coffee letting dinner digest. It was very relaxing in a Christian Heavy Metal genre sort of way. I had just finished a heavy cut by the band Pillar and was getting into the Accapella style of Morgan James's rendition of Take Me To Church when a wave of emotion came over me from her song that caused tears to immediately start falling from both my eyes. I got incredibly warm and started to sweat and it was as if for a moment I could feel all of the emotions that she felt while she was singing. Like a feeling glimpse inside her for a moment.

Being an empath this is not new to me but I'm kind of new at knowing for sure I am an empath and learning, growing, and understanding the gift and its unique powers which for me are calming, peaceful, and healing at their core. So I know the events that I am trying to describe to you now are absolutely for real just as written. I say that because things of spiritual nature tend to be written off as crazy or outlandish and sometimes not considered but that's ok not everyone can understand.

  Anyway, where was I? Oh ya, listening to tunes at my desk......

After a few minutes, that wave of emotion subsided and the song changes to Just To Be With You by my fave Christian band Third Day. It's a slow love song with Jesus singing it to us and the lyrics in the last verses go "and I know you don't understand the fullness of my love and how I died on the Cross for your sins. And I know that you don't realize how much I give you, but I promise I would do it all again, just to be with you. And talk about emotion this time it was intense like I was feeling God's love at the deepest level.

So as I'm sitting in my desk chair staring across my living room at the 100-year-old wooden cross I rescued off the old farmhouse next door before they tore it down. I began to feel like who am I that you would even think of me let alone give your life for me Jesus. Then came an almost guilty feeling for a second and a sadness for my past life and fuck like I could have done better kinda feelings when my mouth opened and I said very softly, "I'm so sorry". Things went silent for just a second when a voice quietly replied,

 I'm not! 

I could not help but smile in the middle of my tears because friends, that is my God, and all of his unconditional love and coolness telling me to take a chill pill because he has my back. Sometimes God just wants to connect with us for a moment. Often it's in times like I described where music is being used which is an act of worship if your heart's in sync with it. I think sometimes he does this so that we can feel his undeniable presence and feel his love and peace. Kind of like his way of saying hey what's up, but he's the man upstairs so he does it in a big way.

I just wanted to share that and since it has been a while since I have written anything it was a great way to get my happy ass to sit down and write something, so thank you for always being there friends, and may you receive all the good things life has waiting for you. Stay blessed.

About The Author: Marc is a 53-year-old Author, Speaker, and Soldier in a war to loosen the grasp that Substance Abuse has on our society. He is a Father, Son, and friend to all those seeking refuge from this incorrigible disease. Marc resides in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where he enjoys writing, hiking, and kicking the disease of addiction in the teeth every chance he gets. As Marc always likes to say, be blessed, my friends.

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