Let Me Explain

By: Marc McMahon

Just to clarify a couple of things for a few of you who have inquired and for the few who mistake my writings as being whiney, or as a pity party. How one comes to that last conclusion after reading an entire article of mine is beyond me but then again that doesn’t really concern me. What does is that I know the reason why I write and if only God and I ever understand that then, well, that’s enough for me.

Anyways the reason I am writing this is to make sure that some of you don’t get the wrong impression from my work. Keep this in mind when reading my articles. Although the subject matter may be explicit, deeply emotional, and very painful while it’s being experienced by me and I suppose some of you as readers. But remember this because it’s super important to me.

I write what I write, when I write it, as close to the time that I am experiencing it as possible. As with the last two articles I was able to capture those emotions almost as they were happening with word and share them with you all. Now I share them with you all like I said because it is the easiest way I have found for me to get in touch with the feelings, memories, and emotions that have hidden dormant or gone unnoticed by me because they were masked by my addiction.

Often times like as of late these have come in the form of repressed memories from my childhood that although painful, once felt, processed, and shared with you all are gone, dealt with, and no longer a problem. You see my friends keep in mind that when you are reading an article from me about some painful experience that causes me to shed tears and just want the pain to stop. That by the time you are reading it the next day usually sometimes two. That I have already dealt with it, let it go and moved on. That I am back to walking happily with my silly ass smile on face feeling 100 lbs lighter because I shared it.

Just FYI

So to clear up what just a couple think they know about my writing, let me say this again. I do not write seeking sympathy, lol, quite the contrary. I would not waste our time with an endeavor as pointless, trivial, and childish as that. But what I have done, and will continue to do is share my heart, my mind, and my soul with all those who care to read. In hopes that I can take the experiences, I have gained from going through my own personal nightmare with addiction. And hopefully, use them to stop somebody else from having to see so much of their own.

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To share a message of healing, hope, and love, to all who might care to receive it. To let people know that I have been both physically and emotionally to some of if not the darkest corners hell has to offer and survived, and that if I can do it they can do it too. If in order to reach those people, if in order to maybe give a glimmer of hope to the tragically lost like I was I need to share all of me with nothing held back in reserve. To open my whole life wide open to comment, criticism, and ridicule. I will do it every single time, even if I was never guaranteed to reach a soul.

I would do it anyway simply because someone did it for me and if there is another me out there in my lifetime who is clinging to life as desperately I was two April’s ago. Then I want to make sure they have the opportunity to hear the words of hope come out of a strangers mouth just like I did. I did not recover from my addiction and become a popular writer because of it, quite the contrary.

God rescued me from myself, got me clean, then caused my heart to bloom like a rose on an early spring day with a love for those who are where I was that I cannot fully describe with words. He showed me that by writing not only does it help me but it equally helps others and the feeling that gives me is a feeling of love too, But that love is him loving me for helping share His love to His people here on His earth.

So you see you all what it really comes down to is this. It is not about me, or you, or what any of us even think. It is and has always been about HIM and the Love HE has for US!! You all are truly amazing and I am beyond blessed to have you in my lives. #SoldierOn!!

 

About the Author:Β Marc is a 48-year-old Author, Speaker, and Soldier in a war to loosen the grasp that Substance Abuse has on our society. He is a Father, Son, and friend to all those seeking refuge from this incorrigible disease. Marc resides in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where he enjoys, writing, hiking, and kicking the disease of addiction in the teeth, every chance he gets. As Marc always likes to say, β€œbe blessed, my friends!”my-full-pic-2017_02_08-08_58_09-utc1.jpg

3 thoughts on “Let Me Explain

  1. Amen!

    Loving: “I write what I write, when I write it, as close to the time that I am experiencing it as possible.” and “because it is the easiest way I have found for me to get in touch with the feelings, memories, and emotions that have hidden dormant or gone unnoticed by me because they were masked by my addiction.” Likewise πŸ™‚

    And in addition to that: I think I drank to let things go unnoticed. That was a big part of it: to not feel.

    Sometimes I have difficulty reading some of what you write. It touches me where things still hurt. But that is exactly what sober blogs are for; to educate, inform, let go, heal. Sometimes I find it hard to leave a comment then. But that is ok, I guess, I hope. πŸ™‚

    Keep on doing what you need doing. πŸ™‚ Whatever it takes to be sober is what it takes. πŸ™‚

    xx, Feeling

    Liked by 1 person

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