Musings of A Grateful Addict


BY: Marc McMahon

Today is one of those days that make you happy to be alive. A day when nothing seems to matter but the yellow of the sunshine and the green, of a Fir trees eyes. A day when what would have bothered you last week, gets shrugged off with a wise man's peaceful sigh. When dinners late, but who really cares, and the dessert is burned, so let's go get slurpees.

A day so grand it makes you grateful to be alive, for the endless possibilities that tomorrow holds. The kind of day that just makes you want to call someone you love, and tell them, that you love them. Simply put, "it is a beautiful day to be alive, and I feel greeaaatttt!

As I sit here at the bus stop waiting for the 12:08 express bus I grow increasingly impatient as it is now almost 20 min. late. The thought of getting completely pissed off at the whole situation and inciting a riot crossed my mind. As did skipping running my errands all together and marching straight back to my studio apt/office and writing a very pointed editorial piece about this issue.

Being a writer, of course, makes me speaking my mind really seem important. I mean surely people are dying to hear what I have to say regarding the situation, LOL, a.k.a. (Writers Egos) just keeping it real, I'm not ashamed to admit my faults lol. (If keeping it 100 is a fault I mean 🙂 )

th (1).jpg

Anyways, as I am sitting here at the bus stop pondering these thoughts I realized, it just doesn't matter. It does not matter if the bus is late or on time, or whether or not it even comes at all. All that matters here, all I am in control of here, is how I am going to choose to react to the situation. Being a writer as I mentioned above and having been waiting at this bus stop much longer than I should I think to myself, what is it I can do to make myself feel better about this situation.

MMMM, I know, I'll march right back to my apt. sit down at my computer and write a very course editorial piece about how inadaquate our bus system is and how I think the schedule needs to be updated and made so it has real-time arrival and departure times on the kiosk there at the stop. Surely if I do that system-wide changes will be made and all the credit given to me for my outstanding piece of writing shedding light on the topic!

At least in the perfect world between my ear's that is how things would play out. Can you say delusions of grandeur? 

Writing this I just realized that we really have very little control over what goes on in our world. There are really only two things we have much control over at all from my point of view. Those would be how we behave as individuals, and how we will react to another individual's behavior. That is really it if you think about it. The majority of that I believe is how we react to things that happen around or to us.

Ever heard the old saying every action has a reaction? Then there ya have it, we will even have a reaction to our own actions as well. Maybe not right away but it will manifest itself eventually over time. I think that as addicts in recovery we need to pay extra close attention to this.



If we were to look at how we respond to outside stimulus like a form of self-care I think we may be able to teach ourselves a little bit more self-control, some behavioral discipline that allows us to step back from a situation a second and ask ourselves. Is how I am about to react to this situation going to benefit me or set me back? Simple question that if answered honestly could save us a lot of embarrassment, emotional pain and possibly a relapse if we answered truthfully.

I never thought of that before really. I'm a pretty emotionally driven person so I usually go with the reaction that comes naturally without much thought either way. Then after the fact if it is brought to my attention I was out of line I immediately make amends for my error.

But what if we disciplined ourselves to the point of being able to see it all the way through before we react? I know over the years it would have saved me from many apologies cause I am just a straight up ass sometimes when my heads not all together. Now I know this would not happen overnight and we may never get it perfect but even a little progress along these lines could help our recovery, personal, and professional lives immensely.

We are Soldiers, Warriors in recovery. Let's adopt the Marine Corps Recon's motto and when we are put into a situation. Through hard work and a desire to better ourselves, not only for ourselves but so we can be better friends to others as well. When faced with a situation we adapt, improvise, and overcome it in a way that will have optimum results with as little damage as possible!

If we can agree that no man/women get's left behind and start having some care and concern for the big picture. For not only seeing how our behavior or reactions will affect us but equally as important how they will affect others as well. If we slowly over time can begin to head in that direction as a community just think about how much better off we would be. How much more love we could share, how many more people we could reach and how much better off our children will be and generations to come.

You, me, WE have the power to make this happen, to be this change. To break ground on a new project that may never end up fully completed but that will impact the world like no other has. We Can Do This, my friends. We have that power because;

"Alone we don't stand a chance, but together, we can change the world!"


About the Author: Marc is a 48 yr. old Author, speaker, and soldier against the disease of addiction. He resides in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. Marc’s hobbies include writing, Mt. biking, hiking, and drinking copious amounts of coffee. Marc is also the proud father, of one very outstanding young man. As Marc always likes to say “Be blessed, my friends.” my-full-pic-2017_02_08-08_58_09-utc1





One response to “Musings of A Grateful Addict”

  1. Untipsyteacher Avatar

    Oh boy, I over-reacted to something a friend said today, and then I had to say I was sorry, and felt bad about myself.
    I am way better about these times, but when I am tired or sick, (as I was today), I can react too quickly, take things too personally, and my insecurity goes nuts.
    The good news is, my friend and I both apologized, and we realize these things happen.
    The other good news is, we really can do this together!

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: